24 September 2011

Recollection

Too influenced by people around me.
I realized just how much I'm influenced by the people around me. I've been pulled down by the people surrounding me. I'm getting weak and lazy. Too lazy to trouble myself to try for more. I stopped pushing myself forward, instead, I just go with the flow, satisfied with mediocrity.
When tidying a drawer, my mom found a t-shirt from six years ago when me and my partner accomplished the unexpected. It was a maths competition in junior high. No one in our grade, first year in junior high, ever finished the 20 levels of the quiz. But that year, we did it. That was one of my best years. Since 10th grade, three years later, it has been a spiral downwards.
Remembering those moments, I remember what they used to say to me. 'Keep it up', 'good job' and 'you are amazing'. My self love is huge, and I really need to go back to those days. I wonder if I should move again, to a place where people challenge me to do more.

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